The Defense Secretary released statistics today revealing increased deaths overseas due to proliferation of what experts are calling PCFs, or poisonous candy frogs.  Enemy militia released a thousand of the insidious bio-weapons into allied military bases last month, resulting in everything getting sticky as well as persistent allied casualties.  “They look so tasty,” said one sergeant, “all bright stripes like one of those big lollipops.  You can’t help but lick them even though they’re poisonous.”  Licking one as he spoke, the sergeant did indeed die shortly thereafter.  I am also licking one right now.  Tell my wife I love her.